Frequently Asked Questions

Getting Started and Logistics

  • Sessions are 50 to 60 minutes via secure video. They follow a loose but consistent structure: a brief check-in at the start to cover anything from the week or from last time, the main body of the session to work through major topics, and a few minutes at the end to recap and identify a focus for next time.

    What happens in the middle depends on where you are and what you are dealing with. Some sessions are more practical, working through a specific situation or developing a concrete skill. Others go deeper into patterns, history, or underlying dynamics. Most sessions involve both. You will not be pushed into territory you are not ready for.

  • No. A lot of people who start therapy are not in crisis. They are dealing with something that has been grinding on them for a while, a relationship that is not working, a pattern they keep repeating, a sense that something needs to change but they are not sure what. You do not need to reach a breaking point to make starting worthwhile.

    If anything, starting earlier tends to make the work more productive. Waiting until things are at their worst means the first several sessions are often spent just stabilizing, rather than getting into the actual work.

  • No. This is worth being direct about because it is one of the most common misconceptions about therapy.

    The work here is not advice-based. You will not be told whether to stay in your marriage or leave, whether to cut contact with a family member, or what the right decision is for your situation. Those are your decisions, and you know your life better than anyone else does.

    What therapy does is help you see your situation more clearly, understand the patterns that are shaping your choices, and figure out what you actually want separate from the pressure of what others think you should do. The goal is to support you in making your own decisions from a grounded place, not to make them for you.

  • Neither, and no. Whether you are contemplating divorce, trying to repair your marriage, or somewhere in between, the work here is not about steering you toward a particular outcome. There is no agenda about what you should decide.

    What matters is that you arrive at a decision that is genuinely yours, made with clarity rather than under duress, guilt, or someone else's expectations. That process takes time and looks different for everyone. The role here is to support that process, not to determine its destination.

  • There is no standard answer to this, and anyone who gives you a precise number upfront is guessing. The length of therapy depends on what you are working on, how much history is involved, and how quickly things shift for you.

    Some people come in with a specific, bounded situation and do meaningful work in 10 to 15 sessions. Others are dealing with longer-standing patterns that benefit from more time. Most people find a natural rhythm and have a sense of when the work feels complete.

    There is no pressure to continue beyond what is useful to you, and no expectation of an open-ended commitment. This gets discussed openly as the work progresses.

  • You do not need to open up immediately, and there is no expectation that you will. Building a working relationship takes time, and that is completely normal. The first several sessions are often about getting comfortable with the process and developing a sense of whether this feels like the right fit.

    You are in control of what you share and when. There is no agenda to get through a set of topics on a particular timeline. The work moves at the pace that makes sense for you.

  • For the issues addressed here, including relationship challenges, divorce, trauma, anxiety, and chronic stress, research consistently shows that virtual therapy is as effective as in-person work. The format is different, but the therapeutic relationship and the quality of the work are not diminished by it.

    Many clients find it easier to be candid from their own space, and the removal of travel time reduces a real barrier to consistency. Sessions are delivered via a secure, encrypted video platform that meets Ontario privacy requirements.

  • This is more common than people expect, and it is worth taking seriously rather than dismissing. There are a few reasons therapy does not land the first time: a mismatch between the therapist and the client, an approach that did not fit the specific issue, starting before the person was ready, a focus on symptom management when the underlying patterns needed attention or vice versa.

    If previous therapy felt too focused on feelings without practical application, too generic, or like it was not addressing what was actually going on, those are reasonable concerns to bring to the free 15-minute consultation. The goal is to work out whether this approach is likely to be different, before you commit to it.

About Shelby and Her Approach

  • Both are regulated mental health professionals in Ontario, but they are different designations with different scopes of practice.

    Psychologists hold a doctorate (PhD or PsyD), are regulated by the College of Psychologists of Ontario, and are authorized to conduct psychological assessments, administer standardized testing, and provide formal diagnoses.

    Registered Psychotherapists hold a master's degree, are regulated by the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario (CRPO), and focus on therapeutic work: processing experiences, examining patterns, and developing practical skills for managing what you are dealing with.

    For most people seeking support for relationship challenges, divorce, trauma, anxiety, or stress, a Registered Psychotherapist is well-suited to the work. If you specifically need psychological testing or a formal diagnostic assessment, a referral to a psychologist would be more appropriate.

  • CRPO stands for the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario. It is the regulatory body that governs Registered Psychotherapists in Ontario, in the same way that the Law Society governs lawyers or the CPSO governs physicians.

    Regulation means that RPs are held to specific standards of practice, ethics, and professional conduct. It means the public has a mechanism to file complaints if something goes wrong. And practically, it means that your benefits plan is more likely to cover sessions, since most insurers require that services be provided by a regulated professional.

    You can verify any RP's registration status on the CRPO public register at crpo.ca.

  • Most extended health benefit plans in Ontario include coverage for registered psychotherapy, but coverage varies. Some plans list it explicitly under "psychotherapy" or "registered psychotherapist." Others list it under "counselling" or "mental health services."

    Before your first session, contact your benefits provider and ask specifically whether Registered Psychotherapists (RPs) regulated by the CRPO are covered, and what your annual limit is. If you are unsure what to ask, the cost of therapy page on this site has more detail.

High-Conflict Divorce and Legal Proceedings

  • Book a free 15-minute consultation through the booking link on this site. It is a short, low-pressure conversation to see if this feels like a good fit. You do not need to have your situation figured out before you call. No commitment is required, and there is no intake paperwork at this stage.

    If you decide to move forward, you will set up an account and schedule your first full session. You will receive an intake form before that appointment. The first session covers the form together, informed consent, and getting to know what has brought you in. It is a starting point, not a deep dive.

  • Individual sessions are $150 for 50 to 60 minutes. This applies to all standard individual psychotherapy appointments.

    Additional fees may apply for services outside of sessions, such as letters, reports, or court attendance. These are billed at the same hourly rate on a pro-rated basis. Corporate training and consulting is priced separately. Contact for details.

  • Most extended health benefit plans in Ontario include coverage for registered psychotherapy, but the specifics vary by plan. Before booking, check with your benefits provider to confirm:

     

    •        Whether Registered Psychotherapists (RPs) are covered under your plan

    •        Your annual coverage limit

    •        The process for submitting claims

    Direct billing is not currently available. Sessions are paid at the time of booking, and you submit claims to your insurer directly. For more information on costs and coverage, see the cost of therapy page on this site.

  • 48 hours notice is required for any cancellation or rescheduling. Appointments cancelled with less than 48 hours notice will be billed in full. This applies to all sessions regardless of the reason.

    If something comes up, reach out as early as possible. The 48-hour window exists to allow the time to be offered to someone else.

  • Monday through Thursday, 9am to 5pm. All sessions are virtual. You do not need to be in a specific location in Ontario to book, but you do need to be an Ontario resident.

About Therapy and What to Expect

  • Adults navigating difficult or deteriorating relationships, separation and divorce, betrayal trauma, and the patterns that tend to follow people from their family of origin into their adult lives. A significant portion of the work is with people in the middle of something specific: a marriage in trouble, a high-conflict separation, estrangement from a family member, an ongoing dynamic with an ex that will not settle, or significant workplace stress. Others come in with a longer-standing sense that something in how they relate to others is not working, without a single identifiable crisis.

  • Yes, and a meaningful portion of the caseload is men. The presenting issues are often the same as for women: divorce or separation, high-conflict dynamics with an ex or family members, relationship patterns that keep repeating, or the sense that something is not working but it is hard to name what.

    The work does not require you to be highly emotionally expressive or comfortable with vulnerability from the start. Much of it is practical and analytical, looking at patterns, dynamics, and what is driving them. If you are skeptical about whether therapy is a useful use of your time, the free 15-minute consultation is a straightforward way to find out without committing to anything.

  • Trauma-informed and integrative. That means drawing from several evidence-based methods depending on what fits the person and the problem, rather than applying a single framework to everyone. The approaches used include ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy), DBT (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy), psychodynamic therapy, somatic work, Gestalt, and narrative therapy.

    In practice: the work addresses both immediate challenges and the patterns underneath them. It is practical without being superficial. It goes at your pace. And it does not involve being told what to do.

  • Registered Psychotherapist, regulated by the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario (CRPO #12083).

    •        Master of Arts in Counselling Psychology, Yorkville University

    •        Honours Bachelor of Science in Psychology, University of Toronto

    •        Bachelor of Arts, York University

    •        Certified Clinical Trauma Specialist (Individual), Arizona Trauma Institute

    •        Certificate in Alternative Dispute Resolution, York University

    The Certificate in Alternative Dispute Resolution is relevant for clients navigating high-conflict separation or divorce proceedings. It provides specific context for the legal and procedural landscape clients are often dealing with alongside the emotional work of therapy.

Ontario Specific Questions

  • This is a common question for clients who are navigating family court or custody proceedings, and it is worth being straightforward about.

    Providing letters or clinical documentation is possible in certain circumstances, but it is not a standard part of the therapeutic work. Requests for documentation are handled carefully and on a case-by-case basis. When documentation is provided, it reflects what can be clinically observed and reported within the scope of the therapeutic relationship. It does not constitute a legal opinion or expert testimony, and this practice does not provide legal advice of any kind.

    If you are involved in legal proceedings and have questions about documentation, raise this in the consultation or early in the therapeutic relationship so expectations can be clarified upfront. There may be additional fees for documentation prepared outside of regular sessions.

  • This is a question that comes up for clients in high-conflict legal situations, and it deserves a clear answer.

    Registered Psychotherapists in Ontario are subject to court orders and legally issued subpoenas. If a court order or judge-issued subpoena requires disclosure of records or attendance, that obligation exists and cannot be refused. This is a legal reality for all regulated health professionals in Ontario, not something specific to this practice.

    Outside of a court order, session notes and records are confidential. They are not shared with your ex-partner, their lawyer, family members, or anyone else without your explicit written consent. If a situation arises where disclosure may be required, the aim is to speak with you about it first if time and circumstances allow.

    If you have specific concerns about records and legal proceedings, this is worth discussing early in the therapeutic relationship so you can make informed decisions about what you share and when.

  • Yes, and in some ways this is where individual therapy is most useful. High-conflict separation is one of the most sustained sources of psychological stress a person can experience. It does not end when the legal proceedings do. It tends to involve ongoing co-parenting conflict, communication that stays difficult, financial stress, and the challenge of rebuilding a sense of stability while the situation is still active.

    Therapy in this context is not about resolving the conflict itself. That is the job of mediators, lawyers, and the courts. What therapy addresses is what the conflict is doing to you: the hypervigilance, the exhaustion, the impact on your parenting, the way the stress of the legal process affects your nervous system and your decision-making. Working on those things has practical value for how you navigate the proceedings, not just for your wellbeing in the longer term.

    My Certificate in Alternative Dispute Resolution from York University and past experience as a Family Law Clerk inform this work. It provides context for what clients are dealing with procedurally and what is typically driving high-conflict dynamics, which makes the therapeutic work more grounded in the actual landscape rather than abstract.

Still have questions?

A free 15-minute consultation is the most direct way to get them answered. It is a short conversation with no commitment attached. If this does not feel like the right fit after speaking, that is useful information too.