In Part 1 of this series, we looked at what parentification actually is: the two forms it takes, what it teaches children about themselves and relationships, and why it tends to go unrecognized for so long.

This post picks up where that one left off. Because understanding what happened is useful. But most people who come to therapy aren't there to understand their childhood in the abstract. They're there because something in their present-day life isn't working: a relationship that keeps breaking down, a pattern they can't seem to get out of, a version of themselves they don't entirely recognize.

So, this is about the present. Specifically, about four patterns that show up consistently in adults who took on a parentified role as kids.